June 01, 2014

Not Allowing Adversity to Define Your Future

Over the past few months I have been dealing with personal struggles after sustaining an injury in March, to say it has been a trying time is most definitely an understatement.  These past three months have continued to test me as a person in ways I haven’t been tested in quite some time.  Since being injured I have had most of my independence taken away, and worst of all it has taken me out of the pool.  Now as an athlete that part in and of itself has been devastating, but aside from my swimming this injury has also broken open wounds that have been healed for quite some time.

At this point we all know how it happened, I walked in and I never walked out.  It was January 21, 2008 and within the blink of an eye my world changed.  Following that day I decided to move forward.  I made the choice to not let this define me and since that day I have for the most part done just that, moved forward.  I created a life for myself, a life not defined by my wheelchair, but unfortunately what I have learned is that once again life has a plan of its own.  At the beginning of March when I sustained my injury despite everything I have done for the past six years it felt like I went right back to square one.  Now that might sound a little dramatic, but in these past six years I have become so incredibly physically strong I literally have moments I forget I am paralyzed, until now.  Since my injury in March I have physically been unable to wheel myself, transfer independently, dress myself, drive, and the list goes on.  My independence has been stripped and though I know it will all come back the waiting, the trial and error, the reminders of just how paralyzed I am has gotten wearing.  However, just like anything in life I am reminded again it isn’t the circumstances that define us, it is how we react to the circumstances that defines who we are.  This is simply a road bump, a moment in time that too will pass.  I will return to the pool, I will continue my journey of training for the Rio 2016 Paralympic Games and I will come out stronger then before.

Over the past three months I have had a lot of time to reflect and write.  During that time I have come up with the following list of “tips” if you will for personal growth, because I have realized we all can use a reminder of what is important in life.  No matter how successful we are, no matter what stage of our lives we are in, no matter what path we are on, we all face adversities everyday.  These our my reminders, my pointers for how to insure we are continuing to grow personally, because until we take the time to focus on our personal growth we cannot expect ourselves to grow in the other aspects of our lives.

1.)   Let the past be the past, cherish the memories, learn from the adversities, but in no way live in it.  Move toward the future and allow yourself to simply let go.

2.)   Don’t allow yourself to get so caught up in the future that you lose sight of the present.  Allow yourself to have dreams, goals and ambition, but don’t let them keep you from enjoying the here and now. The journey along the way is what makes the end goal so special, so enjoy it!

3.)   When you get overwhelmed remember, baby steps.  Life is a series of baby steps.  Just like you cannot recite the alphabet without everything in between A-Z, life is the same, and each baby step is a part of the journey so embrace them.

4.)   Remember in any situation, it isn’t the circumstances that define us; it is how we react to them that defines us.

5.)   No matter how hard it gets remember that it can always be worse.  Take the time you need to grieve, but then move forward and remember to be thankful for what you do have.

6.)   Love. Love yourself, find love in the things that you are passionate about, and love another.  The accomplishments in life are gratifying, but what do they mean if you don’t have anyone to share them with? Don’t allow life to wedge itself between you and your loved ones.

7.)   Believe in yourself and allow yourself to hold onto the innocence of your childhood.  Remember that time that we all believed we could be anything and do everything? Don’t let life wear that away, hold onto it and allow yourself to believe anything is possible.

8.)   Give back, as a citizen of the world it is a duty we all have to give back, it is not only a good deed, but it also teaches you a lot about yourself and life in general.

9.)   Allow yourself to continue to learn.  Whether it is a new hobby, learning something new at work, or simply learning something new about a loved one.  Always continue to learn more about yourself, the people around you, and the world you live in.

10.)  Most of all…live your life with passion, heart, free of fear, hate and judgment.  Be courageous, and know that in any given moment you can make a difference and you can change the world.